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Generic Viagra, Cinderella and the Happily Ever After (Featuring Generic Viagra in a key role And they lived Happily Ever After... so the fairy tale ends, but Cinderella was finding that life wasn't quite the way it had seemed when her handsome Prince had swept her off her feet into the technicolour sunset. Oh no, once they were in the carriage the Prince had withdrawn into funk and was refusing to consummate the marriage made in heaven. Cinderella had tried a few tentative attempts at intimacy and been rejected firmly. Did she just say "Erectus Augustus?" Generic Viagra in Latin My girlfriend is a high school Latin teacher. No joke. Given that information, you might assume she's a real stick-in-the-mud. The fact is, she's a little hottie, and a total sex maniac. Some nights she calls me Augustus Maximus. Others, she calls me Phallus Imperator. Others, she refers to me as Lickus Clitorissimus. That's how things were before I needed Generic Viagra. I used to give it to her long, hard, and righteous, like Cicero used to give it to his ancillae (that means slave-women, guys). I used to probe her with the scepter of Julius Caesar. She used to refer to my colossal erections as a symbol of the Roman Empire-the so-called fasces, which were a bundle of rods tied around a battle axe. Back then, I didn't need Generic Viagra to get a towering hard-on. But, hey, times changes. Empires come and go. And soon, I began having erectile dysfunction problems that could have brought an emperor to his knees. My little Latin teacher was going off to class deeply unsatisfied-it hurt me to look at her! I realized that I'd have to get serious about my problem, instead of denying it. I'd had enough of the stupid diets and holistic healing techniques that involve grinding the horn of a rhinoceros and mixing it into your coffee, and all that nonsense. I decided to order Generic Viagra, and I went online and ordered the stuff. True, I continued eating raw oysters, at least half-a-dozen a day. With generous portions of beer. This was my sexual health regimen, and I think it was a good one.